To my girl,
You are the love letter, I can’t read anymore, the same I hate to throw away
You are the broken nest, I can’t stay anymore
You are the melted eyeliner because of heavy teardrops, I can’t blot with my shirt or handkerchief
You are the story of broken home, I would die to rebuild…
Girl, you are the story to tell, notes to take and wishes to pin; but sadly, you are not someone to keep inside the pocket of my soul; you are always happy to be pick-pocketed. As long as you are with someone, they have most valuable gold coin in the world; and when you go they are pauper, penniless…a parasite. Still, you are someone to paint the days with brightest shade of yellow. I will always adore the afterglow of the sun when it sets rather than mourn over the coming darkness. I will appreciate the day even after sunset. I will admire you even if you go. You have made me believe in building castle in the air. You have made me realize how it feels to be in the storm and still feel like dancing. You have made me watch the beauty of a flying feather. You have made me realize the beauty of fallen leaves. You are a wildflower, you energize everyone to be wild.
Even if we part ways, even if we may call it quits, still the journey with you is a legacy. Guess what, even today when I stand at the window of our “ready to collapse house of love”, I only see “love”, still left in us. I don’t see future, but I see the finest sides of life. You are the cuckoo of the spring, no matter how many springs I’ve already spent inhaling other flowers or watching the other birds, I will still fall for you. And you will make me realize, what a life changing experience it is to listen to cuckoo’s song for the first time at the advent of the spring!
Pic courtesy: Fanpop
To the guy who is a mess,
I cleanse my room, decorate the walls, cover the floor with carpet…and wait for you to come over and make it a mess once again! You scatter everything of its place, rumple the bedsheet, take down my favorite posters, erase my written words from the wall, you attempt to make coffee or omelette just to make my kitchen a mess, you feed the whole milk to our pet cat, you polish the fish off plate and keep rice as it is, you bring cauliflower when I ask you to buy broccoli, you spill the ‘Bourn Vita’ on my freshly prepared bed, you leave the half eaten biscuits on the table and ants come to bite me, you make airplane tearing my notebook page, you fill the washing machine with your old dirty jeans and my favorite jacket, you replace my face wash with your shaving cream, you open the window amid storms and dusts come to puzzle me; you open the window amid rains and the sudden splash makes my things wet…
Still I open the window and wait for you. I see two people in the same umbrella and imagine us; I watch the colorful cars on nearly empty rainy streets and imagine us on a road trip. I enjoy our midnight conversations, drunk confessions and fights over a bar of chocolate or a tub of ice cream. I miss the passionate kisses. I love it how you skip the dinner and eat all the cookies at 1 am. I love it how you save the last cookie for me. I watch you as you fall asleep on the floor like a baby. I truly wait for you to come and make my room a mess once again. I find messy things really attractive when the reason is you. I inhale you from those messy things, I touch you through them. You are my mess.
The girl who waits for you.
Pic courtesy: pt.depositphotos.com
To the girl who was my everything,
Girl, I know you are mad at me. I do understand your anger; that’s why I am writing to you rather than speaking on phone.
Yes, I am guilty. I have cheated on you with another woman. But believe me, I didn’t do anything intentionally. This is happening to me for the first time. I was always loyal to you. I never let any woman touch my shirt, keep head on my shoulder; I never hold their hands. I have politely said ‘no’ to coffee dates. Still, I couldn’t resist this woman. I have discovered a new me getting lost in her. She has colored my soul with a vibrant shade of red. And this red is the color of devastation. For the first time, I am letting my house collapse on fire, I am watching the storm raffle my belongings and a part of me getting shattered with you. I am watching you falling apart and dying inside.
I don’t know why this is happening to me. As if a sudden ray of the afternoon sun has touched me to make me do things that are purely illogical. I have taken off the shirt tagged with ‘good boy.’ For the first time, I’m enjoying being a bad boy. I didn’t gain anything being good for years. I know, being bad won’t help either. Still, I want to get carried away. I know, you are probably cursing me, praying for my destruction and I want to get destroyed, happily. The sin tastes so good!
I will never deny our connections; I will never disown any association with you. You will always be there in a secret cell of my heart.
The boy whom you don’t want to see anymore.
Diary of a jerk:
The crazy winds grazed my face adorably, the first ray of the morning sun invaded my eyes and some morning birds kept chirping. On such a cloudy morning I discovered myself in bed with my ex. I opened my doped eyes and felt like I was just dropped from the sky! It is a very natural feeling when you wake up after long. And I slept like eternity! Slowly the memories of yesterday evening along with the steamy night came before my eyes and I sighed. I searched for the packet of cigarette and her solemn face caught my eyes. Once again her sweet face made me forget what I was searching or what I was thinking.
I looked at the walls; the tiny bulbs are still twinkling. The windowpane is also glittering, bedecked with tiny raindrops. The posters laughed at me. And I looked at her sleeping face. I gazed as if she is the sleeping princess and I am the prince charming to wake her up! Her lunar tattoo on neck greeted me a good morning. Slowly, my eyes rolled into the room, the floor…the paper rolls are still scattered, the empty bottles are lazing away the time. They too probably are quite surprised seeing us together.
I remembered how I met her last night, how she was crying, how I took her home…my home! I remembered how we powdered our noses and drank hard liquor as if there is no tomorrow. And then, like two highly reacting chemicals, we mixed up in bed. Thunders were deafening, lightning was loud and it rained torrentially. We both bafflingly tried to invade and console each other. I wonder how I am still alive after taking so many drugs together!